The
Lightness of Being
As a long-time friend and student of the Dalai Lama, Surya Das tells the story of how he received his first teaching about Being Light from this great spiritual leader.
As a long-time friend and student of the Dalai Lama, Surya Das tells the story of how he received his first teaching about Being Light from this great spiritual leader.
An American guy stood to ask the Dalai Lama the
following question: "What is the meaning of life?"The Dalai Lama answered, "To be happy and
to make others happy."
At
first, Surya Das admits, this seemed a superficial answer. Today, he
appreciates the wisdom of those simple words.Julia: For
many of us, the spiritual path has been difficult. And yet we know
there must be a place where it becomes lighter — where the struggle
becomes less arduous and we begin to experience that lightness of
spirit we knew as children. Can you speak about this, please?Lama
Surya Das: Part
of lightening up is letting go of some of the burden. We take
spirituality, religion, identity, and the big questions in life very
seriously. And they are serious.
But they shouldn't be too serious.
It's important to wake up to the funny sides of things, and not
believe so much in our self-importance, our prejudices, our heavy
opinions, perspectives, and beliefs.
If we take ourselves too seriously, life isn't much fun.Julia: I hear you saying that our beliefs and opinions are part of the burden we need to release in order to be Light.Lama Surya Das: The Buddhists say to cherish the truth, but not to cherish your opinions.
Of course, we all have opinions and preferences. That's only human. But we don't have to hold them so heavily. We can wear them more lightly. For example, I'm a Buddhist, but I don't take it that seriously. I'm sure that Buddhism is not the final word.
We need to realize that we will lose some of our opinions as we travel the path. We need reality and truth, not just opinions. And truth has to be personal experience. Whether or not we decide to believe or join or sign on to some outside system, we have to find reality and truth within ourselves.Julia: And what about the opinion we have of who we are?Lama Surya Das: We need to let go of that. The lightness of being or joy begins with authenticity, and this means letting go of who we think we are, leaving more room in present time to find out who we really are — and letting that new identity emerge.
The extra baggage from the past is something we have to pay for, just as we have to pay for every extra kilo of baggage on a flight. Living in the moment is really the ultimate, and when we can get into the moment we can free ourselves from the burdens of the past.
In Eastern mysticism, there is a lot of thought about returning home — coming back to who we really are, finding something outside of ourselves, or even within the next life after we die. But it is important to realize the joy or buoyancy of being right now, here in this world. There is an updraft of joy and buoyancy to the spirit of Being Here Now.
This awareness of the moment frees us from our karma. It actually frees us from our karmic conditioning, and then we can let go of who we used to be. We are actually free from the voices of the past and past conditioning.
How do we live more in the Now? This is the question. Of course, the Now is where we are. But we need to be aware of this, and for that we need practices — like meditation or exercise We need a place in which we are aware of the time and space we are in now, but simultaneously aware of the timeless Now.
We have to connect the eternal Now with the present now — not the spaced-out presence of watching television, or mindlessly completing tasks.
We need to be connected in a sane, healthy way to the timeless Now — the moment — as well as the past, present, and future. I'm talking here about clarity and balance, and not going over the deep end. In this place, we are free. We are of the world and living in it. We don't have to negate the world, we don't push anything away — but we are also not overly vested in it, either. We become One with it. This is the Buddhist teaching of the Middle Way.
There is a balance, a freedom, a lightness, a joy in this place. Spirit is joy, Spirit is freedom, and Spirit is bliss. It is not a chore, a dogma, or a mental belief. It is like rest, because it is born every minute.
And there is joy in the transparent quality of Light, not just in its degree of brightness. Instead of just seeing things "out there," we begin to see through things. And when we reach this point, we start to see that everything — not just human beings, but all beings, all parts of creation in every moment, every molecule of the Universe — takes on the appearance of Light.
Lightness is joy. Life is a delight. Life is a joy.Julia: I think for me the greatest heaviness comes when I focus on the need to change someone else in order to be happy. Can you give us some advice about this habit of thinking?Lama Surya Das: There is something that we never learn in school, an incredible secret teaching: Whenever we change, everything changes.
Just realize that when we fight with reality as if we are going to change it, all we do is stir up more dust. The situation wouldn't be there if we weren't supposed to see the Divine in it. If we can't see the Divine — or the joke — in it, we have to keep living through it and be reborn until we get it.
We always want to change our mates, change our present circumstances, change our child or colleague. But when we change ourselves, the world looks different.
Moreover, the more we love and accept ourselves, the more others will love and accept us. And when we accept our mate, for example, this creates a transformational magic that completely changes our relationship.
It's counter-intuitive, but we should accept this as a great spiritual magic.Julia: My own feeling is that we cannot really accomplish this lightness of being until we change our habits.Lama Surya Das: That's absolutely correct. Spiritual practices come into play here, because they help us ultimately detach ourselves from our conditioned responses. Starting new spiritual practices and better eating, exercise, and work patterns definitely makes us more joyful and brings wonder and lightness into our lives. This is the way we connect to the Divine on a daily basis.
The bad news is that we really are heavily conditioned with the old habits, patterns, or karma. But the good news is that these habits, patterns, and karma are just ruts we are in, and new, lighter ruts can be made through spiritual practice and discipline. So we can recondition ourselves through better habits and thus detach from our old conditioning.
There is a great deal of freedom and joy in changing our habits and doing spiritual practice, a lot of wonder and joy in freeing ourselves from our old patterns. There is reinvigoration and refreshment from this. It is actually like having a second or third youth!
If we take ourselves too seriously, life isn't much fun.Julia: I hear you saying that our beliefs and opinions are part of the burden we need to release in order to be Light.Lama Surya Das: The Buddhists say to cherish the truth, but not to cherish your opinions.
Of course, we all have opinions and preferences. That's only human. But we don't have to hold them so heavily. We can wear them more lightly. For example, I'm a Buddhist, but I don't take it that seriously. I'm sure that Buddhism is not the final word.
We need to realize that we will lose some of our opinions as we travel the path. We need reality and truth, not just opinions. And truth has to be personal experience. Whether or not we decide to believe or join or sign on to some outside system, we have to find reality and truth within ourselves.Julia: And what about the opinion we have of who we are?Lama Surya Das: We need to let go of that. The lightness of being or joy begins with authenticity, and this means letting go of who we think we are, leaving more room in present time to find out who we really are — and letting that new identity emerge.
The extra baggage from the past is something we have to pay for, just as we have to pay for every extra kilo of baggage on a flight. Living in the moment is really the ultimate, and when we can get into the moment we can free ourselves from the burdens of the past.
In Eastern mysticism, there is a lot of thought about returning home — coming back to who we really are, finding something outside of ourselves, or even within the next life after we die. But it is important to realize the joy or buoyancy of being right now, here in this world. There is an updraft of joy and buoyancy to the spirit of Being Here Now.
This awareness of the moment frees us from our karma. It actually frees us from our karmic conditioning, and then we can let go of who we used to be. We are actually free from the voices of the past and past conditioning.
How do we live more in the Now? This is the question. Of course, the Now is where we are. But we need to be aware of this, and for that we need practices — like meditation or exercise We need a place in which we are aware of the time and space we are in now, but simultaneously aware of the timeless Now.
We have to connect the eternal Now with the present now — not the spaced-out presence of watching television, or mindlessly completing tasks.
We need to be connected in a sane, healthy way to the timeless Now — the moment — as well as the past, present, and future. I'm talking here about clarity and balance, and not going over the deep end. In this place, we are free. We are of the world and living in it. We don't have to negate the world, we don't push anything away — but we are also not overly vested in it, either. We become One with it. This is the Buddhist teaching of the Middle Way.
There is a balance, a freedom, a lightness, a joy in this place. Spirit is joy, Spirit is freedom, and Spirit is bliss. It is not a chore, a dogma, or a mental belief. It is like rest, because it is born every minute.
And there is joy in the transparent quality of Light, not just in its degree of brightness. Instead of just seeing things "out there," we begin to see through things. And when we reach this point, we start to see that everything — not just human beings, but all beings, all parts of creation in every moment, every molecule of the Universe — takes on the appearance of Light.
Lightness is joy. Life is a delight. Life is a joy.Julia: I think for me the greatest heaviness comes when I focus on the need to change someone else in order to be happy. Can you give us some advice about this habit of thinking?Lama Surya Das: There is something that we never learn in school, an incredible secret teaching: Whenever we change, everything changes.
Just realize that when we fight with reality as if we are going to change it, all we do is stir up more dust. The situation wouldn't be there if we weren't supposed to see the Divine in it. If we can't see the Divine — or the joke — in it, we have to keep living through it and be reborn until we get it.
We always want to change our mates, change our present circumstances, change our child or colleague. But when we change ourselves, the world looks different.
Moreover, the more we love and accept ourselves, the more others will love and accept us. And when we accept our mate, for example, this creates a transformational magic that completely changes our relationship.
It's counter-intuitive, but we should accept this as a great spiritual magic.Julia: My own feeling is that we cannot really accomplish this lightness of being until we change our habits.Lama Surya Das: That's absolutely correct. Spiritual practices come into play here, because they help us ultimately detach ourselves from our conditioned responses. Starting new spiritual practices and better eating, exercise, and work patterns definitely makes us more joyful and brings wonder and lightness into our lives. This is the way we connect to the Divine on a daily basis.
The bad news is that we really are heavily conditioned with the old habits, patterns, or karma. But the good news is that these habits, patterns, and karma are just ruts we are in, and new, lighter ruts can be made through spiritual practice and discipline. So we can recondition ourselves through better habits and thus detach from our old conditioning.
There is a great deal of freedom and joy in changing our habits and doing spiritual practice, a lot of wonder and joy in freeing ourselves from our old patterns. There is reinvigoration and refreshment from this. It is actually like having a second or third youth!
Meditation
One
of the shortest and most effective meditations is to take a short
breath and smile. This only takes five seconds, but it can be
repeated for one minute. This can be done either sitting or standing,
eyes open or closed. This is one of my favorite American meditations.
It's short, easy, and you can do it anywhere.
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